It's NOT All About Me

There was this shirt that I saw the other day while shopping that said, "It's all about me!" I wanted to buy it to please the sarcastic side of me.

You see, as a mom and wife, really, it is never ever about me. Ever. Let's go back and see what it was like when it was about me.

First, I purchased all my clothes from high end stores, Harolds, Ann Taylor, White House Black Market (this is high end to me anyway). One work ensemble would cost more than I spend in 2 months on groceries now! Crazy now that I think about it. I carried high end purses (Kate Spade was my favorite), wore MAC make up, wore high end sunglasses, bought whatever I wanted really, had my hair highlighted and cut at a high end salon, traveled to Jamaica, Hawaii, California, etc. I hired an interior designer to help me design our previous home (why not, I stunk at it!). We saved nearly half of our income before kids, too. Chris and I did whatever we wanted. We were alone, in love and happy. But, I worked hard making a 6 figure income and did not have kids. Chris did got whatever he wanted to (motorcycle that I bought him for his 30th birthday, Audi TT, got his pilot's license, etc). I mean really, we did not need half of the stuff we had. It was, back then, about us. That is what "It's all about me" looked like...and really, it was about Chris and I.

Then we had kids and I changed...HUGE! MAC make up was exchanged for whatever was on sale at Target, I started to cut and highlight my hair once a year, purses were purchased rarely and from Target, Sunglasses were $10, I clipped coupons and price matched, and I almost completely stopped buying clothes so I could save very penny I made that did not go to daycare so I could quit my job. Chris turned in his sweet ride for a family friendly Toyota Camry (which we bought new with cash!). It was no longer about ME or Chris and I together...it was about US, our family.

I quit my job. Me was then gone. It was now all about US. It has been about us every since. That is my job as a wife and mother, I believe.

Chris and I rarely buy each other anything. We bought each other iPads for Christmas last year which was the first big thing we had really gotten for ourselves in a long time. We have free cell phones that are not even close to being smart (they are the top rated phone for tweens, though), clothes are from Kohls, Old Navy or Gap (although I have been splurging on Athleta recently and have been known to get clothe at Von Maur on sale), and entertainment is a play date with someone I like, too. We do not find this to be a sacrifice as it is what is best for our kids. We will hopefully have many years together where we can do more things with just the 2 of us. The kids will only like hanging out with us a few more years. We have to appreciate the time we have with them while they are young, as it goes by SO STINKING FAST! For now, we are happy watching a movie at home with microwave popcorn after the kids go to bed for date nights. I actually LOVE doing this! See...I'm a changed woman.

Our decisions are always made in the best interest of the kids and our family. If someone or something (like many extra curricular events at night, too many play dates, etc) comes between our family with their unkind actions or words or time wasted, we avoid them. Period. The family unit and it staying intact is too important to me to jeopardize for things or to make other people happy. Again, it is about US, not about ME. But, if it were just about me, I'm thinking my decision would be similar. Before kids, I would not have cared as much about some things that I care about now, as my kids are effected by others' actions now, too, not just me. My kids do not have any cousins or at least any relationship with any cousins. Some would say that is my fault, but I, of course, disagree. But, I am okay with that. We have friends come to birthdays and to play with the kids instead to make up for the loss of extended family. We are surrounding ourselves with positive energy, people who want to be around us and vice versa. Life is too short and our time with our kids being young is too precious to waste.

Next year things will probably change some as I plan on returning to work on some level. With that said, we have learned a lot having me at home. Some things we will never go back to. When I return to work, the number one goal will be to pay off our home, save for college funds and retirement.

No matter where life takes us, however, it will always be about us.

To Sleep at Last

I will admit it, our kids had horrible to sleep habits until now.

Before we moved, the kids went to bed with little issue. We always had a nice routine...bath time, book time, prayers, night night. Period.

Then we moved...into a small apartment on blow up beds. And, that all changed. Routine? Um, we were in very close quarters. The girls were in the same room, Asher was in a room where he could see us. The girls played at all hours while Asher usually ended up sleeping with us.

We moved and then their was the new house to get used to. Bad habits just got worse. That is...until Sunday.

After over a year and a half of trying to get the kids to stay in bed...I stuck it out and I believe fixed them!

Sunday night I decided that this was the week that I would listen to Super Nanny. I saved baskets of laundry up in our bedroom. Then, I would put the laundry away as I waited for the kids to stay in their rooms and fall to sleep. Sunday was a little challenging as the kids got used to Mommy's new way (Daddy usually heads to the basement after good night kisses). Monday, I cleaned the upstairs bathrooms while I waited for the kids to fall to sleep. Tuesday, I put away more laundry and scrubbed the bathroom floor while I only had to remind the kids once to go to bed. By 8:30, the kids were asleep. That brings me to tonight. 5 minutes is all I had to wait for the kids to fall to sleep! Seriously! No running to each others rooms, no playing, no stair work out for Mommy as I ran up and down the stairs.
Is it too early to say they are fixed? Oh...the feeling of parenting success, if only by the direction of the Super Nanny.

Asher, asleep holding the tag of his PJs!

SAHM Life of Bliss

Just "Hangin Around" all day long

Most people looking at me think I have the life...the life of bliss.

I don't have to get up every day and go to work. I don't have a boss to report to. I don't have people talking bad about me or unhappy customers. I am a stay at home mom (SAHM) and have a life of bliss.

I love staying home, don't get me wrong. We did not decide to have babies so that daycare, grandparents or other complete strangers could take care of them all day. I wanted to raise our kids myself. So, I saved money, stopped buying $300 handbags, having pedicures, spending $$$ on getting my hair done, put a huge limit on eating out, cut out cable TV, don't have a silly smart phone (and I think I am smarter for not having a smart phone by the way), and my closet has seen better days just to name a few things. I do not get to stay home because we have so much money it is streaming out of my Gucci Handbag. I stay at home because Chris and I decided it was what was best for our kids, and we worked and continue to work to make it happen. But, I do not see any of that as a sacrifice.

Chris gave me joy by helping me find a way for me to stay home. Okay, I may be a penny pincher, but I want to continue to stay at home. You know, so I can sit around and do absolutely nothing all day and enjoy a life of bliss.

I know, that is what every one thinks I do all day. Absolutely nothing.

As much as some days I wish that were true, it simply is not.

I am the Mommy of 3 kiddos, the playmate, the Austin Household merry maid, the Austin household laundromat, the Austin kiddos tutor, the Austin accountant, the social calender manager, the pastry chef and household chef (I'm not sure I would call my cooking chef like however), the personal teacher, car pooler, the adventure taker taking the kids here, there and everywhere, Catholic instructor, exercise Nazi (gotta keep the kiddos active), and, last, but not least, the poop picker upper. Oh, and unlike people who have "real" jobs, I do all of these things because I love to, not because I get paid to, unless you count my payment in kisses.

And, to top it off, I do go off to try to save lives a few times a month at a hospital as a nurse. And, unlike the "normal" population, I sacrifice sleep so that I can stay home and play with my kids after that joyful night at the hospital.

I love my "job" as a SAHM. I get to see every moment of our kids' development, get to volunteer when I can at the kids' schools, and I get to spend as much as their precious childhood with them. I would not have it any other way. I would be sad to have missed many of the "firsts" that I have been blessed to see while being at home with our 3 kids.

To clarify, I don't have to "go to work" but I do work. I do have a boss to report to. My kids and my husband are constantly telling me if what kind of a job I am doing. I am always trying to please them and do better to kiss up to my bosses so they pay me more (in kisses, of course). Unfortunately, I do sometimes have "unhappy customers." If you ever try calling me during the day, you may just hear one of those times when I have an unhappy one.

With all of that said, there is one thing that those naysayers have right. I am a stay at home mom and I do have a life of bliss.

Enjoying some cuddle time

Gods Blessings

Addi and Asher at the Park

Mommy's Girl

A big pretzel treat...Mmmm! I would (and could) never miss this!

Walking around Shadow Lake together

Making a bread store run (and they give free rolls to the kids!).

Alivia scooting away...

Weee...

Okay, I'll admit. Some days are just plain sh*tty. Need I say more?

1st Grade Bully

Alivia came home from school one day saying she girl in her class that was being mean to her and called her a "bully." The girl was taking things from her during class, telling Alivia that should could not play with this girl and other girls in Alivia's class and telling Alivia not to talk to Kindergarteners (they go to lunch and recess with them and Alivia knows one girl who is our neighbor).

Come to find out...I know this girl! I have witnessed this girl poking fun at Alivia, and Alivia just walks away. I just thought the girl was having a bad day and Alivia was to just take it.

So, what is a mom to do? So, I told Alivia, if this girl is not a nice girl, Alivia does not want her as a friend. Period. I told Alivia that we should all surround ourselves with people like ourselves with similar values. Alivia is a very nice, sweet, but quiet girl. She believes, or at least believed, that everyone was her friend. Her little bully is teaching Alivia that everyone can not be your friend.

Perhaps I should say that everyone is not worthy to be Alivia's friend.

That is one hard lesson to learn, especially for a 6 year old in the 1st Grade.

The Annual Austin Family Campout!

2010 Annul Austin Family Backyard Campout

 

 

 

Last night we had our annual family backyard campout. We have scheduled this event many times during the summer. But, there were so many reasons not to camp...fireworks, the heat, wind, I had to work, etc. Finally, last night, the weather was perfect, the wind was still and it was perfect. Chris got the tents set up and I got the smores. Mmmm! After a watching Horton, the kids went right to sleep. Okay, Addi and Asher skipped naps, so that may have helped. But, it was a fabulous night to sleep under the stars. Now we have some camping gear to buy for next year!

Smores!

 

 

 

 

 

Our version of roughing it!

The morning after the night before

Krista's Lawn Mowing... ...has closed until a rider lawn mower can be purchased. Seriously, this house, the yard, and the future sidewalks that will need to be cleared are exhausting me. I am not joking. I know, everyone thinks I am this lazy person who does not want to work because I am a stay at home mom. Well, I challenge anyone who thinks that to maintain my "Job" for 1 week, and I have big bets that nobody would do it. Okay, I admit, I am whining. Who wouldn't? It is no secret, Chris loved this house. It is also no secret, that I did not love it. I compromised...a lot. The things I despise about our home now I actually did not consider before moving here. For example - A bigger yard. Everyone wants a bigger yard...except those who have a big yard. Seriously? Want to mow the bigger yard? Um, no. I mowed today for over an hour and 20 minutes. I mow at top speeds pushing it with a self propelled push mower. Seriously, who would go speed walking for an hour and 20 minutes? And, while speed walking, find things to do for your active 2 and 4 year old kids? I am thinking only crazy people. So...that must be me. And, as I mow, I look down our endless sidewalks thinking, "There is NO WAY that I will be able to clear those walks...let alone the driveway...with our normal sized snow blower." You know me, minimalist all the way. This house...not a minimalist house. The yard and walks fail miserably as well. I want to be able to enjoy my life, not be tortured to near death all summer and winter long maintaining the outside. Interior Design I kind of secretly enjoy. The outside, I outwardly despise. So, I am now on the hunt for a riding lawn mower. Call me a weeny...but I know nobody else could push mow our yard and live to talk about it.