Getting Back Out There

After years, months and days of not working full time, I have started to get back out there and look for employment. I know, everyone thinks I am so lazy. Really, I do not care what they think. :) What other people think about me is irrelevant. I have only not worked at all for 1 year since I left my pharmaceutical job 5 years ago, and by that I mean worked outside of the home. Having 3 kids and a house to take care of is a lot of work.
I did not work outside the home at all while I was nursing Asher. As soon as Asher turned 1 and started drinking out of a cup, I worked at night at Janie and Jack. I worked there for fun, but it turned out to not be fun at all. Shortly after leaving there, I got the PRN nursing job that I have now. Really, I had no idea what I was getting into. I just wanted something to keep my license up. I worked 2 eight hour shifts a month for the first couple years. Then I increased it to 4 eight hour shifts, then I started working 4 twelve hour shifts, then down to working 2 twelve hour shifts and one eight hour a month,and now they want me to go back to all 8 hour shifts (and back to 4 nights a month). Really, I only work 3-4 times a month, but it seems like I miss so much more. I miss 2 weekends a month with the family, I miss several hours of sleep since I typically only sleep 4-5 hours if I am lucky between shifts, and I really do not feel like I fit in at work. It is far from something I ever envisioned myself doing, but it has helped me to keep my nursing license current.
Anyway, with our lurking bleak future outlook, I started to look for a real, full time job. I have interviewed for a nursing job, but I would be working EVERY SINGLE weekend. I would never see our kids and I would only see Chris in passing. I really did not want to do that. If Chris becomes unemployed, I would take it. But, until then, I have some options (at least I hope I do). I have a phone interview lined up for a pharma job, which is really what I want to do. My full time experience is mostly in the pharma industry, but it is very difficult to get back into.
Getting up, dressed, kids up and dressed, and heading out the door into rush hour traffic for my interview...the memories all came back to me. This sucks! I hated the rushing around, the lack of time to get anything done at home, the split second conversations in the morning as that is all I had time for, etc, etc. Am I ready for that? At this point, no, but I will have to be ready or not. Shoot, I did not even know what to wear. I totally need a new wardrobe, just for interviews! I am 5 years older, will they hire this old mom? My resume is out and leaving my inbox daily.

Now...the wait begins.